At the start of every school year, my school district requires all employees to complete a training for sexual harassment. And, no, it isn’t a how-to.
See, it’s lame jokes like that that would at least add a spark of decency to what is truly a pointless, weird annual exercise whose stern seriousness makes it ten times as awkward as it already is. This training used to be a video that we all had to get together and watch, but in the last few years it has become an online training, which has two benefits: first, we can watch these awful videos in the privacy of our own classrooms and on our own time. Second, I can take screenshots and make fun of them here.
All of the following are real pictures from the current sexual harassment training offered by my school district, with my cute comments along with each. Enjoy.
Here we see a pair of pants, upset by a hostile work environment. Also, this is the first in a series of scenes featuring female predators.
This woman is giving an awfully eloquent speech for someone who's busy nuzzling someone else's neck. This is the second female predator.
Could this guy be any more sleazy looking? Who posed these models? Also, what the heck is he trying to seduce her with there? A pair of bills from Monopoly? Tickets to see Whitesnake at the county fair?
What woman reacts to groping with a calm request explaining her unhappiness? Shouldn't she be kicking him in the crotch?
Our third female predator. Also, whoever wrote this seems to think there are still girls in high school named "Susan."
Alas, the first option was not the correct answer.
Actually, some of these people look like they're harassing each other right now.
"Crossing the boundary" or "making a strange circle around the boundary"?
Female predator #4. Apparently, the school district thinks our fair little town is overrun by randy women.
Not only is this female predator #5, but it reinforces an unfortunate stereotype about female gym teachers.